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How much should I tell dad about the cancer?

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Not sure if anyone can help but at least I can sound off a bit. Just got off the phone to dad’s docs and they were pretty blunt about the fact his prostate cancer is widespread and he’s probably looking at a couple of years. They’ve spoken to me because he hates anything to do with doctors and hospitals and even before this diaagnosis the last six months have been a nightmare with him raging about having a catheter and threatening suicide because ‘life isn’t worth living’, 

Sorry to be so miserable but I really don’t know how much to tell him. They’re going to put him on hormone therapy because his general health is too poor for anything ore invasive they say. And the grown up in me thinks he has the right to know all the facts. But the part of me that’s had to cope with six months of moaning and bad temper and complaining thinks that might be one difficult conversation too many.

Not sure anyone but me can answer this but I’d be SO grateful to know of other people’s experiences.


  • Not sure if anyone can help but at least I can sound off a bit. Just got off the phone to dad’s docs and they were pretty blunt about the fact his prostate cancer is widespread and he’s probably looking at a couple of years. They’ve spoken to me because he hates anything to do with doctors and hospitals and even before this diaagnosis the last six months have been a nightmare with him raging about having a catheter and threatening suicide because ‘life isn’t worth living’, 

    Sorry to be so miserable but I really don’t know how much to tell him. They’re going to put him on hormone therapy because his general health is too poor for anything ore invasive they say. And the grown up in me thinks he has the right to know all the facts. But the part of me that’s had to cope with six months of moaning and bad temper and complaining thinks that might be one difficult conversation too many.

    Not sure anyone but me can answer this but I’d be SO grateful to know of other people’s experiences.

    Kaytwo you really have my sympathy. But I think Fiftysomething is right and you should talk to him about it.  A friend of mine was in exactly the same situation, though it was made worse by her mother being in complete denial. She couldn’t accept her husband was dying, wouldn’t talk about it and wouldn’t let her dad have some of the conversations he wanted to have. It was a really terrible few months and I think they are still dealing with the fallout, 2 years later. Good luck.

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