My elderly father needs care at home such as helping change sheets and clean

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his house has deteriorated very badly over the past 10 years, l have also recently found out that he is peeing himself in public places. I live away from him and don’t know what support is available. I really think he also needs a nurse or someone professional that can access how he is living. I am so worried that he will fall again (he has been admitted in to hospital 5 times over the last 2 years). My father won’t directly ask for help but l know he really needs it. Any advice would be really helpful.


  • his house has deteriorated very badly over the past 10 years, l have also recently found out that he is peeing himself in public places. I live away from him and don’t know what support is available. I really think he also needs a nurse or someone professional that can access how he is living. I am so worried that he will fall again (he has been admitted in to hospital 5 times over the last 2 years). My father won’t directly ask for help but l know he really needs it. Any advice would be really helpful.

    Hi, Your father is entitled to a full Care Needs Assessment which will be carried out by professionals at Social Services. You need to contact Adult Access in your Father area. Explain about your fathers falls, and say that his health and wellbeing is at risk. Explain he is allowing his personal hygiene to suffer and your concerns about his home environment. Your Fathers incontinence issues can be carried out by an incontinence nurse based at his GP surgery. This issue quite common but it needs to be addressed to avoid UTI’s (urinary tract infections) and the obvious issue of perhaps upsetting someone if he is found urinating in public. Your GP can refer your Father to Social services as a possible ‘falls risk’ but also his incontinence. If your Father is found to not meet the criteria for support because he is either over the financial threshold or they feel he is still managing then they will be able to signpost you to services in your area to support your Father for example care agencies for care in the home. It sounds to me as though your Father is not managing, this has to be dealt with carefully to avoid upsetting him. keep talking to him, explain what you are doing as once you have contacted Adult Access they will want to carry out a telephone assessment in the first instance and if he denies needing any help they will close the case – Your father has a certain amount of pride, no one likes to admit to not coping. Personally I think an accompanied GP appointment may be a good idea. Hope that helps. Good luck

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